While it can be tempting for Rockville parents to splurge on their kids during divorce to help reassure them of their affections, some suggest that parents resist doing so. This resistance may be especially challenging if there is joint child custody, which may mean that both parents are not on the same page as far as "emotional spending." This can lead to resentment of the parent who does not spoil, and can be damaging to the way that kids view money. This may be one potential issue that parents want to address in whatever co-parenting or child custody agreement they reach during divorce negotiations.
Divorce is wrought with emotions for everyone involved, including kids of all ages. However, that does not mean that kids cannot find the help or counseling that they need without breaking their parents' banks. There are many reasons why parents may choose to overspend on their kids during or after divorce. Some of the reasons involve guilt, trying to impress the children or attempting to make up for lost time. However, none of these reasons is strong enough to counterbalance the reasons not to spoil kids for the sake of divorce.
A financial expert recommends that parents use caution and common sense when spending on their kids after divorce. One of the first things that it is recommended for parents to do is to establish a guideline between everyday expenses and extraordinary expenses. In addition, parents who share joint custody or visitation should work together to stay on the same page with spending, guidelines and expectations to avoid confusion and a lack of stability from having different rules in each household.
When Rockville parents have joint child custody, their lives may be complicated as they strive for consistency. When parents can work together to find a balance that works for both households and will translate in a positive way to the kids, the entire family unit may remain more intact. The process can be challenging, but parents may be able to address such considerations in their co-parenting or child custody agreements as they negotiate the divorce process. Having an experienced family law practitioner review such agreements may help a spouse go through such a process with greater confidence.
Source: Huffington Post, "Spoiled? How Buying Your Kids Love During A Divorce Can Hurt Them And You," Suzanna de Baca, Oct. 26, 2012